A few months after the loss of my husband, a group of people we had extended a helping hand to in their time of need came to my house with lots of food, loving support.......and, PRESENTS?
The food was delicious and the support appreciated. Soon, everyone gathered around, anxiously waiting for me to open up the 6 gaily wrapped presents. They brought the gifts, they said, to cheer me up.
I took a deep breath, hoping I could get through this graciously.
The first opened present was a cassette of The Bear Tribe Songs. (It felt like someone whacked me on the back of the head but I managed a very polite thank you.)
The second gift was Black Elk Speaks. (Oh, hells bells, I couldn't even speak)
The third gift was Coyote Medicine by Lewis Mehl-Madrona (Geeze, just shoot me, NOW)
The fourth - Sacred Path Cards & book by Jamie Sams (The once delicious food is now seriously threatening a fast release upwards)
The fifth - Four books by Sun Bear (Eyes now running & nose twitching from unexpressed hysterical laughter)
Lastly - A kit containing Lakota Sweat Lodge Cards by Archie Fire Lame Deer (THAT DID IT!! I exploded with weird sounds & tears flying. I was clutching at my midsection, painfully trying to gasp out some form of coherent words)
I managed to plead an exhausted headache and they left. It took about an hour for me to get it out of my system. The occasional giggle would crop up for quite some time after that.
I took the whole kit and caboodle of the professional frauds to one of those "Donation" boxes and flung them in!!
These non-indian folks bought all of their gifts from a book store in Kent run by a twinkie/wannabe with a Cherokee Princess Grandmother.